Your Past Doesn’t Define You: How To Continuously Build Your Identity

In a world that is constantly trying to define who you should be, it can be daunting to find the courage and self-belief to stay true to yourself. However, it is possible to continuously build your identity and find the path that is right for you. 

It’s important to not forge a path solely based on your past accomplishments. ​​Everyone can relate to the feeling of being defined by their past. Whether it be a bad experience, a mistake, or good experiences, such as accolades, awards, and accompaniments– our past can often define how we view ourselves and how others view us. But that can cause us to feel overwhelmed, anxious, and in a state of panic. 

No one knows that feeling better than Emma Jack. Emma is a Sport and Orthopedic Physiotherapist and owner of Press Play Physiotherapy and Pilates in London, Ontario, Canada. She holds a Master of Physiotherapy as well as a Master of Clinical Science, has her Sports Physiotherapy Diploma, is a Fellow of the Academy of Manual and Manipulative Physical Therapy, and is a lead therapist with the Canadian National Women’s Hockey Team.

Emma’s credentials span two lines on a business card, but in recent years Emma has transformed her practice and life to ensure that her accomplishments are not all that defines her. Once Emma recognized that her past accomplishments and fancy titles from schooling left her feeling intense anxiety and chronic stress, she decided it was time to rewrite her story.  

Own the past you without letting it define the present you. 

Establishing a personal philosophy is an ongoing process that helps us navigate the ups and downs of life. As we grow older, become wiser, and learn hard lessons from tough experiences, it’s important to constantly re-center ourselves and prioritize our passions. By doing this, we can ensure that our personal philosophy is a source of strength and stability during times of adversity. It can help us stay focused on what matters most to us and make sure that we never lose sight of our goals. Having a strong personal philosophy can be the key to finding success in life.

Building a personal philosophy comes down to answering five fundamental questions. These answers will help you stay the course through troubled waters, distractions, and the incessant need to compare your actions to those of your peers or to your past self. 

Question #1 What are your values? 

Knowing your core values can help you make tough decisions in life and stay true to yourself. It can also be a great way to challenge yourself and see what serves you best in terms of happiness. Emma recommends naming 3-5 core values. When it comes to figuring out your core values, it's important to take the time to reflect on what matters most to you and what will bring you closer to achieving your goals. 

Your personal philosophy is at the heart of understanding your core values. Taking the time to define them will help you stay focused when faced with difficult choices and keep you on track when making decisions that affect your future. By understanding what truly matters most, you can make sure that any decision or action is aligned with your values - leading toward a happier and more fulfilling life.

Question #2 What are your habits? 

Habits are the building blocks of our lives and they shape us into who we are. It is often said that it takes 21 days to form a new habit, but in reality, it takes around 66 days or 2 months. This means that forming healthy habits takes dedication and determination.

Forming new habits can be a daunting task because it requires us to go against our core values and personal philosophy. However, if we can make small changes in our daily routines, such as waking up early or eating healthier food, then we can slowly start to form healthy habits that will benefit us in the long run.

It is important to remember that forming new habits is an individual journey and what works for one person may not work for another. So find out what works best for you and stick with it until you have formed the desired habit.

Question #3 What is your mindset? 

In her book “Mindset: The New Psychology of Success,” Carol Dweck argues that there are two types of mindsets that exist: a fixed mindset and a growth mindset. A fixed mindset is one in which individuals believe their abilities and traits are static, while a growth mindset is one in which individuals believe they can develop their abilities and traits through effort and dedication. Dweck suggests that the type of mindset an individual holds determines how they approach challenges, how they respond to feedback, and ultimately how successful they will be. Therefore, it is important to understand your own mindset and make sure you are defining yourself through a growth-oriented perspective. With the right tools and resources, you can develop your skillset to reach your goals and achieve success.

Early in Emma’s career as a Physical Therapist, she equated her worth to the output of work she accomplished day in and day out. But soon that “grind all the time” mindset caught up to her and she started experiencing burnout– a tale as old as time. 

It wasn’t until Emma’s mindset changed, that she started feeling like herself again and living for new (and improved core values)! Her new values taught her to slow down, reflect, and live in the present. 

Question #4 What currently defines you? 

It is easy to let our past accomplishments, expectations, and goals define who we are today. But it’s important to remember that these things don’t necessarily define us. We are more than what is on a business card or a resume. Our personal philosophy should be based on our values, what we believe in, and how we want to live our lives. We should not let our past experiences dictate who we are today but instead use them as lessons that help us grow into the person we want to be.

For Emma, the journey to finding her true self was not an easy one. After working in a job that was defined by her past, she realized that it was not making her happy and that she wanted to transform it to better fit with her lifestyle and make her feel more fulfilled. This led Emma to discover Co-Active coaching, which has allowed her to help other women show up fully for their lives and careers in an authentic way. Through this work, Emma has found joy and happiness as she helps others find their true selves. She is now living a life where she can be free from her past self and focus on her present self. 

Question #5 What makes you happy? 

Happiness is something that transcends all superficial goals. It is not about having the most money, the best job, or the most fame. It’s about knowing what you want at the end of the day and finding ways to make it happen. To find true happiness, we must live simply and prioritize our passions in our work. We must also remember to be kind to others and be grateful for what we have. When we find what makes us happy, it will guide us through life and help us achieve our goals in a meaningful way.

We all strive to find our purpose in life and it can be hard to know where to start. But what if the answer was within you all along? This blog is based on Emma’s story about continuously building the real you, and working through all of your worries and doubts. It's about finding work that speaks to your soul and enjoying the challenges that a new job brings. Learn how to be true to yourself, trust your instincts, and find out what makes you happy. With this guide, you can take control of your life and embark on an exciting journey of self-discovery! Head on over to the Jackie Serviss Show to listen to the episode I did with Emma!